Grand Canyon, AZ — New Mexico and Arizona are cold and snowy. Arid my ass.
Didn’t find much of a late night scene here (and by late night I mean 9:00 PM). This area shuts down pretty early in the winter. Hit town about 8:30. Checked in, took my luggage to my room, changed, freshened up, hit the streets and the side walks had been rolled up and put away for the evening. Can’t beat dinner from a hotel vending machine.
If you have never driven across the northern portion of NM and AZ (along Route 66 or I-40) make plans to do so. The scenary is gorgeous. Every time I topped a hill or rounded a curve my eyes popped my dick got hard and i droped my jaw. Then I excalimed “wow!” or “oh my god!” or “holy shit!” or “geepers!” or “gee wilakers!” If I took a picture of every breath taking view it would take months to drive that strip of road.
Alburquerque became the second city on my trip to bury the needle on the this city is a lot bigger than I thought it would be scale (Tulsa being the other). As a bonus, I can now correctly spell the name of New Mexico’s largest city on demand (thus winning me many bar bets if the waitress from “Roxanne” was telling the truth). While I’m sure Albuquerque has a vibrant night life, my hotel was one of those situations where I look out the window and think “Hmmm… do I get drunk at TGIFridays or do I get drunk at Applebee’s?” Sure I could take cabs, but that completely negates the awesome deal I got on the hotel. I could’ve spent the extra cash and been in the middle of the scene. Always remember, cheap hotels are cheap for a reason.
New Mexico is a funny place (I mean they didn’t even ask me for a passport). The welcome center had horse corrals. Like some one decided to take Trigger from Amarillo to Flagstaff via I-40, but needed to stop off and pick up some brochoures and a complimentary coffee. I stop at every state’s welcome center. Why you ask (or more than likely you don’t care)? FREE MAPS! It’s not that I’m cheap, just boning up for my cartographer exam.
Had a great ipod shuffle moment today. It went from David Cross’s bit about having a gay lover that looks like yourself and being able to basically fuck yourself into NWA’s “I’d Rather Fuck You.” Made me chuckle.
Nice to see Anderson Cooper back in New Orleans. I was moved when he spoke about how this city and these people needed to be kept in the spotlight. He said the nation had moved on, but the residents of the Gulf South haven’t. Really? When is the last time you were in town Anderson? I believe it was in early October when the old guy got beat up on Bourbon Street. And why are you back this week? Could it be because of something Mayor Nagin said on Monday? FUCK YOU NATIONAL MEDIA! I heard Fox News will dispatch Gretta Van Sustren to New Orleans just as soon as she finds the corpse of Natalie Holloway.
It was announced this week that erectial disfunction drugs have been linked to vision problems. And hack comedians around the world held hands and sang Kumbaya.
And speaking up comics, what’s up with this Kevin Garnett guy? He’s never even had a half hour special, but he already has a shoe deal with Adidas?
Men’s (where does that apostrophe go?) rooms have become increasingly automated. The toilet flushes automaticly, the soap dispense automativly, the sink turns on automaticly and now even the paper towels dispence automaticly. Next step automatic doors. Then the only thing I have to touch is myself. And a memo to powers that be, if you decide to make that process automated, put a personal touch in. There’s a world of difference between a cold pair of tongues and a pair that has been heated. And maybe I’ve developed a hankering for conspiricy theories because I have been to a few too many assasination museums this week, but sometimes I worry the sensor on the urinal has a camera in it.
Tomorrow I will see the Grand Canyon. Just a smidge behind that on my to-do list is a trip to Walgreens. I desperately need some personal hygience products. Because hotel soap is just a notch above patchuli on my desired smells.
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